1 post tagged “top 10”

today i will pretend like i have some knowledge and/or authority over what is stylish and/or fashionable. ;]
so without any further ado, i present to you my top 10 list of fashion do not ever ever evers:

10. wide-leg bondage pants covered with neon reflective strips. yes, i will [sadly] admit that i might actually be guilty of owning a pair or two of these back in my gothic raver preteen days, but...sometime soon this trend has really got to stop.

9. flip-flops... in the dead of winter. come on now.

8. velour/terry cloth track suits, complete with "ass word." these can be found in an array of puke-inducing neon colors. often paired with #7.

7. uggs. not only do i hate how these boots look, but i hate the majority of girls who wear them because for some ungodly reason they think that wearing these fuggly [snicker] boots makes them hot shit.

6. those acid washed/high waisted/tapered leg abominations from the nineties. you might know them as mom jeans. :shudder:

5. covering yourself head-to-toe with monogrammed pieces; i.e. this louis vuitton bag with these versace sunnies and this dior top. drowning yourself in designer labels doesn't make you look classy. it makes you look like a snob who just wants people to notice her wealth and/or social status.

4. okay now imagine the same girl from #5...except all her shit is FAKE. adds a whole new level of trashy to her materialistic [but cheap] ass.

3. ultra low-rise jeans, and the resulting asscrack/thong peepshow.

2. t-shirts with "witty" phrases/double entendres/overtly sexual references on them. ugh. we can thank abercrombie & fitch for the vast majority of these.

1. ...and finally, i now present to you...the worst of the worst: crocs. there are no words to describe how hideous these shoes are. i honestly just can't understand how anyone ever thought these would be a good idea. as if they weren't bad enough to begin with, apparently now someone has created tiny decorative plug acessories for the holes...and in doing so, has found a way to make mankinds most heinous creation even MORE ugly. but what really gets me is that people really wear these things. maybe there really is no hope for us after all.

alright, so there you have it. my satirical, sarcastic, yet oh-so-true list of the worst fashion crimes of all time. sidenote: i'm pretty cranky due to the no-sleep factor...that seems to be where all this bitchy angsty viciousness is coming from.

heh.

anywho, i'm off to make a cup of tea :) good morning lovelies! have a fabulous monday!